Stress Busters

If you read my last post, you’ll understand my stress level has been at code red since my father died. I wish time would pause to let this digest but life keeps moving right along, doesn't it? And when life keeps going and going, we need tools to manage the stress that comes with it. I wanted to share my two favorite & most effective tools to relieve stress: Music & Sex.

Music is one of the most primal forms of human communication and expression which explains why it strikes such a chord with us (pun intended). When I was young, I wanted to be a singer but couldn't sing. I decided to study sound in college but I'm no musician or engineer. When I look back on it now, I just wanted to close to where the music was happening. I believe my Dad's eclectic tastes in music made a lasting impression on me and  is probably why music is such a force in my life. Music is important to me because he showed me how it will enrich your life if you just open your ears & your heart. 

I love all types of music but I have to give proper credit to the perfect stress buster, Bob Marley. Bob sings “One good thing about music, when it hits you feel no pain” and I couldn't agree more. My love for Bob was reawakened after seeing a documentary about his life last year and I felt I needed more Bob in my life. The messages he sings about happiness & love really affected me now more than when I was in college.  When trying times struck and my father fell ill, Bob was my savior. On long drives to and from the hospital, he was there, reminding me “Everything is gonna be alright” because “Through high seas or in low seas, I’m gonna be your friend”! Through his music I was able to stay present to the “One Love” that connects us all. His music soothes and satisfies my soul and puts me in a happy, relaxed state of mind.  Even without smoking pot, his voice helps me reach a higher consciousness. I can speak from experience that music can help you get through anything life throws your way.    

I'm sure it’s no surprise to anyone sex is the other weapon in my stress buster arsenal. Marvin Gaye said it best; “When I get that feeling, I need sexual healing." But what's funny is, I don't even need to “do it” for sex to bring me joy and relaxation. Just thinking of it, reading about, or watching it eases my mind. It ignites a fire inside me similar to the fire James Deen started a few years ago! Even if I wasn't able to have sex, silly tweets from my favorite porn stars would help take me away like Calgon! Naughty pics from my friends and trips to my favorite sex shop helped clear my head. Don’t get me wrong, the act of sex is the most relaxing of all. But for me, sex is more than just a physical act, its my reason for getting up in the morning and pushing through another day. 

The Perfect Combination 

Neuroscientist have conducted studies on how sex and music effect our brains. Because music and sex independently release dopamine in the brains reward system so it's pretty obvious they go hand in hand. This explains why when used together, they can create a whole new world for you in the bedroom. If you don’t have a sexy BangList, make one NOW! It doesn't need to be a filled with 90’s R&B slow jams by R. Kelly or oldies but goodies from the 50’s or 60’s like Unchained Melody (the song from Ghost).  I prefer groovy, dreamlike lounge music like Thievery Corporation, Ratatat, Royskkop, Massive Attack, DJ Shadow, RJD2. I prefer more melodic songs with limited lyrics to avoid your mind wandering off into the words. What’s good is our minds actually follow the rhythm anyways. Whatever makes your body move slowly & rhythmically should do the trick. If rock turns you on, find the sexiest, dirtiest rock you can. Maybe tonight you want to make love to your partner so you choose softer, sweet, romantic songs. But maybe tomorrow night you want to be dominated, so you find something a little more rough. Whatever you’re in the mood to experience, music can only help enhance your sexcapades.

Music & Sex are essential to my survival and I hope to yours too! On a spiritual level, I believe music like sex taps reaches a part of our higher selves & touches a deeper part of our souls. Both elements have the ability to propel you to another space and time and can make you laugh, cry, feel joy & pain but will always effect us viscerally. Sex & Music are ultimately about connection! Connection to rhythm, body, heart, mind, soul, spirit and to another human being, also looking to connect.

I’d love to hear what’s on your BangList! Tell me what songs or artists get you revved up in the comments section on my blog!

XXX & Luv & Music,  

LT